Review of Piranha 3D (2010) by Michael T — 23 May 2012

Piranha 3D is all kinds of stupid. Right from the opening sequence, the audience watches Richard Dreyfuss - yes, Richard Dreyfuss is in Piranha - reprise his roll from Jaws thirty years older. He may have been able to fight off a great white shark, but he's no match for a pack of blood crazy piranhas as poor Hooper gets eaten alive. Then the film turns into a gleefully bright Playboy video as all kinds of young teens bare all at a spring break beach party right before the piranhas decide to attack them. Literally, this movie is all sex and gore.

But as the opening sequence shows, Piranha 3D is meant to be taken as big, dumb, stupid fun. It's completely tongue-in-cheek, and the more it revels in its sheer silliness, the more fun the audience has. They even got Christopher Lloyd to reprise his role as Doc from Back to the Future, playing a crazed marine biologist who tells the characters all they need to know about these types of piranhas.

As with all teen horror movies, sex and death go hand in hand. The hornier the teens, the greater their punishment and likely graphic death. And since everyone in this movie is pretty damn horny, guess how many people are going to get eaten. Of course, our main teenager leads are still relatively pure, so they will just be placed in life-threatening situations, but they won't fall victim.

Alexandre Aja directs, and Piranha 3D just may be the first movie of his that I actually enjoyed. He understands the film he wants to make and he really wants to pay homage to the exploitation horror films of the 1980s. He knows what works in those movies and he doesn't try to make a serious minded film here. This is Jaws gone wild and silly. However, just because this movie isn't to be taken seriously does not mean that it isn't well made. The photography is absolutely gorgeous. The scenery is given that "beach shine" where there isn't a cloud in the sky, the sun gleans off the actors' golden bodies, and the colours are lush and vibrant. The underwater footage is also absolutely incredible. Even the actors recite the B-movie dialogue in an A-list way.

Piranha 3D is definitely not for everyone. It has it's core audience and it's catering to the demands of only that core audience. But Aja and company know what they're doing and they do it with pride.