Review of Paddington 2 (2017) by Jake C — 19 Jan 2018

It was fine but it had the same problem that Zootopia had: no kids in the theatre. Instead, there was this big ass group of people all dressed in bear costumes. We're talking high end stuff, a few guys even said they were wearing the official Country Bears costumes from the 2002 movie. It wasn't so bad... until Padding ton actually appeared on screen. They would release a terrifyingly loud moan and toss marmalade everywhere. They'd only do it if it was only him, not counting background characters. One scene in particular, can't remember which, got people really riled up and they were dumping it all over themselves. They were gentle though and were careful not to get any of that sweet, sticky nectar on my furless skin. When it was finished, they sang the "bear song" which was basically incoherent "roaring". When the credits finished they cried and I cried too. I've gained a large amount of respect for those people and their culture since that fateful night. Maybe one day our paths will cross again at the premier of Paddington 3, and hopefully, Country Bears 2: The Black Hose.

All in all, pretty good, 10/10.