Review of Northfork (2003) by Zak N — 15 Jan 2004

[b]Northfork: *.5/****[/b].

I've never claimed to be the smartest person on Earth, and I'm sure there is a ton of hidden meaning to this film below the surface that I completely didn't notice, but this is nothing more than an exercise in tedium bogged down by its own incompetent attempts at profundity. Like I said, maybe I just don't "get" it. I can't tell if we're supposed to love these characters or make fun of them. First off, Nick Nolte as a shaggy-bearded mumbling priest is not an example of good casting. Then we have the angels dressed up like twisted Shakesperean characters, except for this one dude in a cowboy hat who doesn't say shit. Maybe he's a mute, and I missed the explanation (like I said, totally possible that I don't get it). Darryl Hannah is a hermaphrodyte, this is an example of good casting. Never studied the bible too much, nor have I ever been a fan of religious symbolism in any medium. I like the concept of a town being flooded and some it's occupants refusing to leave, but the interesting parts of the film become flooded themselves in a sea of pretentious spiritual complexity. The dialogue is incredibly weak too.

The only "Wow!" facet of the film is the cinematography and breathtaking shots of the wide-open American West, a place that I've been many times on road trips so it was good to relive some of those moments. I'm gonna go back and read some of the reviews to see how people "defend their love" for this film.