Review of No Reservations (2007) by Jeff B — 10 Aug 2010

There are no reservations about likening No Reservations to a hugely popular food staple known for satiating even the stodgiest of palettes?a candy bar. For that is what this innocuous romantic-dramedy affords filmgoers?not a filling 4-star meal but a sugary snack. Unfortunately, these particular sweets have also been known to cause belly-aches. With this particular confection, the audience can see the simplistic connect-the-dots denouement, climax, and resolution coming from a mile away?the opening credits, to be exact. The only wine that movieoers will get with this entrée is their own as they cry over the loss of the two hours and $9 that they will get back.

In the PG-13-rated No Reservations, a top-notch chef?s life (Zeta-Jones) is turned upside down when she must care for her niece (Abigail Breslin) and contend with the advances of another chef (Eckhart).

Of the cast, only Breslin seems able to turn her one-note character into a 7-course performance. Given scraps to work with, she rouses even the pickiest of moviegoers, which is more than this reviewer can say for Eckhart with Zeta-Jones. As leads, these supposed stars prove as stock as stock can be?and this is not a soup reference. Her career-minded ice princess and his adventurous clown have ?predictable results? written all over them, butting heads then falling in love. Unfortunately, the actors barely go through the motions, bringing a wet noodle?s worth of zest and sexual chemistry to the movie. Watching No Reservations is like coming for steak and leaving with a hot dog.

Bottom line: Someone left this cake out in the rain.