Review of Ninja Terminator (1986) by Phil R — 12 Jun 2007

This is maybe one of the greatest films of all time... Godfrey Ho is known for is known for filming two seperate films and merging them into a single film... This technique, while unique, also completely confuses any plot directive... Basically this film is not be watched for great acting, a deep plot and acrobatic martial arts... It's to be watched because it shits on all of those things and cuddles up warm in its own pile of faeces...

The direction is completely inept (there's one scene where the cameraman doesn't realise he's not even looking at the actors for about 20 seconds)... There's a scene where Richard Harrison get's a call on his garfield phone, only to have the exact same message reiterated to him by a toy robot... There's a scene where Richard Harrison is practicing his sword skills on a watermelon while wearing a camo ninja outfit... There's a scene where walks down the stairs and instead of just walking down the last 2 or 3 stairs, feels the need to do a forward roll... The dubbing used is abysmal... and so much more I can't remember off the top of my head...

Basically, Godfrey Ho is a god (although none of his other films live up to this one's genius) and Richard Harrison is the greatest ninja to don a camo ninja suit in history...

Get down to Poundland and get yourself a copy...