Review of Ninja Bachelor Party (1991) by Adam F — 09 Aug 2013

This is simply one of the best films ever made. Contrary to the info on this database for dullards, it took 10 years to complete this masterpiece. Although short and somewhat dark, the plot is oozing and dripping with emotion at every twist and turn - like a herpes sore on snooki's cavernous pulsating anus, blasting pus into the stratosphere as she rides a roller-coaster.

The stunts and special effects are second-to-none - either staggeringly well executed or staggeringly hilarious. The linked-arms rolling transition from apartment to grassy hill gets me every time. The characters, 99% of which are voiced by the legendary Bill Hicks, are all extremely well drawn and easy to relate to.

The unlikely loser-hero, with his burdens on his sleeve and the odds stacked against him, the un-supportive drawling rants of his parents, his whore of a girlfriend, the friend-turned-foe arch nemesis.

..etc. Each one will penetrate your subconscious with a signature line of dialog, never to be forgotten. Finally, the soundtrack is a masterpiece in its own right - a bombastic, stadium-shaking rock opera.

All of these elements combined make for an experience with no equal. I could literally watch this movie every single day of my life. Prolonged exposure only results in a gradual but steady increase in your daily merriment.

If you're looking for a flick to throw on for your next stoner sesh, look no further. This is the ultimate. Also, it makes a great drinking game. Have a shot every time they say "Robitussin" or "pharmacy".