Review of Nine (2009) by Tessa R — 11 Jul 2010
In many ways, Nine is akin to a bad pop-music album.
- There's one catchy song and the rest is formuliac filler.
- The overt sexuality is forced and winds up feeling awkward.
- More time is spend on the costumes than the music.
- The initial ideas were developed by the marketing department, not the artists.
- The main character is an insufferable douche.
- The performers are fake and annoying.
- You're left wondering why the least talented person is centre stage being out-done by back-up dancers and singers (ESPECIALLY during Kate Hudson's song).
- Frequently mistakes bright colours and flashy lights for entertainment.
It's remarkable that they had so much talent and potential and yet failed so hard. Maybe it was the clash of ego (everyone seems to get a strictly measured equal amount of screen time), or the actual talent struggling to hold up so many lesser performers, but they've somehow managed to make a sexually charged musical about Italian cinema and culture boring, which is a strangely impressive feat.
This review of Nine (2009) was written by Tessa R on 11 Jul 2010.
Nine has generally received mixed reviews.
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