Review of Nim's Island (2008) by Abigail O — 15 Jan 2009

I didn't like how predictable this was. The idea of the writer being scared of her own shadow and then writing about a fearless hero, was a bit annoying because it was never explained why she was such a heartsick shut-in.

I bet if she existed in real life she'd have bed hair and wear pyjamas and eat pizzas all day, she wouldn't be all Jodie Fosterish. "You're darn tootin, she's quite a doll" to quote Jodie Foster in Freaky Friday.

I thought it was good that this film had a female heroine and she was very plucky, Abigail Breslin. I keep expecting her to put her glasses on, she has a face that looks like it ought to have face furniture, since seeing her in "Little Miss Sunshine" I suppose.

And this is another film by Gerard Butler where he's imaginary! Does he choose these films on purpose, is there an "unreality clause" his agent sends out? "I want to work only if I can only be seen by my heroine because I'm imaginary/a ghost".

(I'm thinking of PS I Love You.) It's nice to hear his imaginary hero's Scottish accent. When he was playing the little girl's dad he had an American accent but it was well dodgy. (Spoilers) I didn't like the way that at the end, after four days of his life hanging by a thread, he was all sexy and up for meeting a sexy young lady and flirting and all that.

He should have had a few days of recuperating before being Mr Sex on the Beach. And from a feminist point of view, Jodie Foster's experience was very bland! Okay, so she travels and haggles for a boat with superstitious natives.

So what??! She appears on the beach and needs to be rescued. She's a bit pathetic and doesn't want to eat worms with Nim. I thought, at this point of the story, will she do something heroic, to justify her need to travel all across the world for this little girl, or will she twiddle her thumbs like a Jane Austen heroine until the big strong love interest crawls out of the sea? And it was the latter! I think this film was a bit overstewed, there were too many things going on, it was trying to be three different films in one, there was the Home Alone plot where the girl is trying to scare away some comedy tourists, and there was the storyline about the heartsick shut-in travelling like it's a big deal, and there was the scientist Dad nearly drowning on a regular basis.

Film makers please remember, less is more. Oh and the voiceover from Nim at the start was so smug. It sounded like one long boast about how they lived on this paradise island. I bet it's not really like that.

It ain't all that to live hugger-mugger with lizards. And at the end, I kept thinking, how sexy are those people given there must be absolutely no access to deodorant products? Well, Jodie Foster's entire suitcase was on the bottom of the sea! Sorry, but I don't buy the whole Paradise island idea.

Harrumph.