Review of Never Say Never Again (1983) by Ola G — 28 Jul 2015

After MI6 agent James Bond (Sean Connery), 007, fails a routine training exercise, his superior, M (Edward Fox), orders Bond to a health clinic outside London to get back into shape. While there, Bond witnesses a mysterious nurse named Fatima Blush (Barbara Carrera) giving a sadomasochistic beating to a patient in a nearby room. The man's face is bandaged and after Blush finishes her beating, Bond sees the patient using a machine which scans his eye. Bond is seen by Blush and an attempt is subsequently made to kill him in the clinic gym, but Bond manages to defeat the assassin. Blush and her charge, a United States Air Force pilot named Jack Petachi, are operatives of SPECTRE, a criminal organisation run by Ernst Stavro Blofeld (Max von Sydow). Petachi has undergone an operation on his right eye to make it match the retinal pattern of the US President, which he uses to circumvent iris recognition security at an American military base in England. While doing so, he replaces the dummy warheads in two cruise missiles with live nuclear warheads; SPECTRE then obtains the warheads to extort billions of dollars from NATO governments. Under orders from the Prime Minister, M reluctantly reactivates the double-0 section and Bond is assigned the task of tracking down the missing weapons. He meets Domino Petachi (Kim Basinger), the pilot's sister, and her wealthy lover, Maximillian Largo (Klaus Maria Brandauer), a SPECTRE agent and the prime suspect of having the nuclear warheads in his possession...

"Never Say Never Again" is a 1983 film based on the James Bond novel Thunderball, which was previously adapted in 1965 under that name. Unlike the majority of Bond films, Never Say Never Again was not produced by Eon Productions, but by an independent production company, one of whose members was Kevin McClory, one of the original writers of the Thunderball storyline with Ian Fleming and Jack Whittingham. McClory retained the filming rights of the novel following a long legal battle dating from the 1960s. The film was directed by Irvin Kershner and, like Thunderball, stars Sean Connery as British Secret Service agent James Bond, 007, marking his return to the role twelve years after Diamonds Are Forever. The film's title is a reference to Connery's reported declaration in 1971 that he would "never again" play that role. "Never Say Never Again" was released by Warner Bros. in the autumn of 1983. It opened to positive critical reviews and was a commercial success, grossing $160 million at the box office, although this was less overall than the Eon-produced Bond film released in June of the same year, "Octopussy". I remember the Bond vs Bond battle that year and when re-seeing "Never Say Never Again" I can´t honestly claim that I think it´s any good which I might have done in 1983. This is a poor remake of the great "Thunderball" due to a settlement of a lawsuit and despite Sean Connery being back as Bond nothing is really Bond with this film even if they try to make it as Bond as they can. On one hand it does follow the normal Bond formula with a "taking over the world" plot, chase sequences, a series of exotic locations, beautiful women, sinister villains and a theme song based on the film's title. But at the same time we have no proper James Bond title sequence, different actors playing familiar Bond characters in a different way and Bond himself is an ageing over the hill agent. In a way it feels more like a poor american overbudgeted 80s action movie, than a classic british Bond movie. And despite having an ensemble with Connery, von Sydow, Carrera, Basinger and Brandauer it simply doesn´t work in my book. von Sydow is hardly that threatening as Blofeld nor is Brandauer as Largo. Carrera is in overdrive and the scene where Bond is forced under gunpoint to write a statement that she was the best lover he has had is just ridiculous. And Basinger looks lost despite her charming looks. Connery himself looks old and only in a few moments he manages to find that Bond sparkle in his eye. The plot is handled in a wishy washy way with scenes all over the place and the movie is way too long. I personally agree to the fact that this will never be part of the classic Bond sphere, because it simply doesn´t belong there.