Review of Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates (2016) by Trevorsview — 13 Dec 2016

It’s based on a true story… sort of. Essentially, it began with these two single fellas whose parents complain to them that they’re always starting trouble at every party. So in order to stay in line, they are told to find dates for their upcoming sister’s wedding in Hawaii. As a joke, they throw an ad up on Craigslist, their description for the essential date looking something like this:

An excuse to get dressed up.

Open bar & food all night.

Eccentric/downright dangerous bro-2-bro dance moves (may need to sign a waiver).

Adventure.

Mystery.

Suspense.

True Love.

Royalties once our night's story is developed into a romantic comedy*.

*if this happens (we estimate the chances at 85%) we refuse the right to let Ashton Kutcher play either of our characters, however, we will consider him for a supporting role.

Next thing they know, they get over 6,000 responses from girls who find them attractive, leading to appearances in talk shows and a series of mock-dates. Fox Studios even made the last part of their ad come true. The unfortunate result is a wild and mean-spirited “comedy” that exists for all the wrong reasons.

The two leading males, Mike and Dave, are played by the overly handsome Adam Devine (Mike) and Zac Efron (Dave). Their dates are played by the even more overly attractive Aubrey Plaza (Mike’s date) and Anna Kendrick (Dave’s date). None of these four young stars are as funny as you’d think they are, and they each resort only to screaming like drunk bozos to spice up the sleazy screenplay. They’re all unbearably annoying to watch, Anna Kendrick in particular. The supporting cast was equally as horrible, say for instance Sugar Lyn Beard, who plays the soon-to-be-married sister of Mike and Dave. She’s not exactly a “bad actress,” she just has this annoying high-pitched voice that doesn’t even sound that natural.

But that’s not even the worst of it. No, the worst is yet to come.

There is no story, but rather a series of jokes that drag on and on and on without a clear punchline. Within the hour and thirty-eight minutes you’ll need to suffer through, a girl falls off a roof and gets seriously hurt, a building catches fire at a 4th of July party, a grandfather dies at his birthday celebration, a girl gets hit in the face by an all-terrain vehicle and is heavily bruised the day before her wedding rehearsal, and all of these bits are intended to be the most hilarious thing ever. But did I laugh? Well no, but the audience in my screening were hysterical throughout the entire movie, which makes me incredibly worried.

Emotional moments of redemption are attempted by the third act, but none of them are earned nor appropriate. The crazy events and dirty jokes all try to meet up in some sort of message about how life is not about getting the big things. Yeah, right. Just the number of “should I really be laughing at this” type of jokes glamorizes the romantic lifestyle rather than attacks it. So therefore, the redemption that this movie tries to get to is complete bull crap. In the end, Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates becomes exactly how it started as: a joke. It thinks that funny is about being rebellious and mischievous, but there’s no way that has any affect in the long run.