Review of Men in Black: International (2019) by Brandoncargill1 — 19 Jun 2019

This movie was absolutely atrocious.Bro, I just went and saw this movie because I love Men in Black, this movie was horrendous. Agent H: The greatest field agent that never actually saved the world. He is completely incompetent, and is not knowledgeable of almost anything. Basically, he's a party boy who used his good looks to swarm his way to the top. Agent M(olly): Mary Sue, who was a shut in her entire life, yet is not socially awkward. Has never been in a fight, but defeats a galactic goddess of death. A hacker who used NASA sites to track down MIB actions, while also TURNING DOWN the FBI and CIA, but don't think about that too hard.... Then waltz's into MIB headquarters, to get interrogated which turns into a job interview. She gives the female chief a few fashion complements, and tells her she's smart and has no life. Gets hired on the spot.

Now, immediately gets to choose her weapon, is a complete dbag, disses the name of the whole organization. "Men in Black, why not people in Black, or humans in Black?".... It's based on a myth about aliens who obduct people. They look like emotionless creatures, dressed in all black suits, and resemble Men... Men in Black... Ffs....

Brand new agent, just gets sent on a special duty to England.. ya know, as new recruits do. Is following top agents around, just casually hangs out with a top agent. F's up the mission, that's fine.

Ends up obtaining a super weapon, that at some point in the movie she fires just because, creates a Grand canyon in the middle of the desert. And not one government agency shows up. Then travels to the goddess of death whom she defeats, who apparently has extremely high security system with many bodyguards, but she just gets on the island because they weren't paying attention or something. Basically like Bond villains, in a world where there's a secret agency above the CIA or FBI surveillance, but apparently have ADT security systems LOL.

A psych out ending, with the villains that have been built up being a bait and switch. Confronts actual villain, this is where it is revealed that agent h never actually save the world. Apparently High T has always been possessed since 2016. Pawns grappling hook can withstand a black hole / vortex that can make people travel across the universe. agent h gets the keys to the whole organization, despite not actually saving the world, despite not being competent in almost any single particular way, and his main rival in the organization gives him the keys because of respect or some BS. And he gets the nomination because the possessed high T, had recommended him before as a good leader. Despite not having shown one single good leadership quality. Agent m knows how to fly the cars and everything, just cause... Guaranteed the people who say they like this film, willl have the most generic responses. the people that dislike this film, will tell you exactly why it was trash.