Review of Margin Call (2011) by Teddy V — 03 May 2012

This movie does such a poor job of bringing you into and up to speed with what is exactly going on, because guess what? Unless you're in the middle of it, making the money, tweaking out on the rush, trading is just really complex math, and math is fucking boring, so it has to be dumbed down the point of an aneurism inducing "entertainment coma" like this movie.

A movie that should have had the tagline, "How many times can they say, 'Fuck me,'?" because I think someone decided to go for the record. That, and they never seem to really get to the heart of what happened in 2008, probably because the writers and director don't have the chops to put it all together, or they just assume that their audience is pack of backyard wrestling, concussion self-inflicting idiots minus two brain cells to rub together.

They're probably right, but I don't fall into that category, and neither should any real film fan. That being the case, I have a considerable amount of pet peeves when it comes to film, but one of the biggest is when a script or director or both banks on star power alone, without investing enough time and effort into character development.

Isn't that what happened with Ishtar, widely considered to be the bomb of bombs? You could get away with relying on raw notoriety or screen presence and nothing else with a script that manages to average an explosion once every 45 seconds, but not if you want to make a good film.

This movie makes that mistake at basically every opportunity, and only has some loud helicopter noise. To wit: Simon Baker, yes? No. I'd pay Demi Moore to wash my dishes or do my laundry, but I'm not a casting director so what the fuck do I know? I know that anyone who would hire her to do a movie these days (decades after she was even close to an idea of hot, because she was never particularly talented) should be pushed into a vat of boiling lard and forgotten (she's no Scarlett Johansson, wink wink.

..). Jeremy Irons is never a good choice, so his inclusion makes little to no sense; he's impotent, flat, boring, and basically worthless. Kevin Spacey is completely wasted, and even Paul Bettany could've given a little more, though he's a rare glimmer of light in this dark mess (the bridge scene is good).

However, the real star here is clearly Zachary Quinto, an actor who seems to be picking up where someone like Heath Ledger left off. I suppose he has to do his fair share of weak scripts before he can play lead roles, but there will be a time soon when he will, and I'm predicting he'll be great.

He'll be greater than he was in this disaster, and he's not half bad here...