Review of Legend (1985) by Emily A — 09 Apr 2011

I can count on one hand the things about this movie I liked. In fact, the main reason I gave it any points at all is because I loved the villain: a fanged, black-clawed, goat-hooved, red-skinned horned demon with a velvety voice and a love of corrupting the cuties.

He is simply the most metal movie villain I have ever seen. Rowr! I love that guy. If he summoned me into his Hell Hall and dressed me all Goth, I do believe my undies would simply disappear. I especially loved the scene where he's trying to win over Mia Sara's character (for some damn reason).

Everything else about this movie I found a little too flat. The good was too white and gleamy-good, the elves were all too over-designed and obnoxious and the forest was too much of a stylized cariacature of an idealized magical realm.

Maybe I saw this too late in the game, and would have liked it more if I'd seen it as a child. But I don't know if this is an entirely appropriate children's film; dark themes and frightening imagery aside, it teaches kids that good is stupid and uncool and evil is awesome.

Which is a lesson they're not supposed to learn until they're teenagers.