Review of Labyrinth (2011) by Catherine S — 07 Jul 2011

I wanted to talk to you all (be prepared this is long) about my all time fave childhood/teen/still loving it movie. Labyrinth (1986) -Okay so here is the story in a nutshell: There is a Sylph king named Jareth (if u want to know what a Sylph is click here:

Sylph(s): an elemental being in the theory of Paracelsus that inhabits air.

A. Sylph's main element is air. They soar through the air looking for something to attract their interest and possibly something that will allow them to prove what they are worth.

B. The sylph has been known to be regal in appearance and the things they do or accomplish.

C. Sylphs have been known to take the appearance of humans which are tall and graceful.

D. A Sylph can change their appearance, and they are also fairly unpredictable beings.

E. Sylphs love children. They have a deep affection and attraction to the younger group of humans.

F. Going back to the wind factor, Sylphs have a lot to do with air in many senses.

Anyways- This Faerie prince turned Goblin King is hot and androgynous and looks like an eternal 20 yr old (although played by a then strikingly handsome 39 yr old David Bowie...thank God cause they almost cast Michael Jackson and that would be creepy!).

He is also an 80's type glam rock god who is sick of his lonely life and his annoying goblin kingdom- and spends his free time in the human world in the form of an owl (can't shapeshift into human form without being commanded to do so).

He starts to notice a beautiful 16 yr old human gal (Sarah) who loves to play fantasy games and pretend (Jennifer Connelly looked older for her age- she was actually 14-15 when they started filming this so any obvious romantic scenes were completely nada as far as Bowie was concerned...poor Jenniffer, I wouldn't have minded having my first on screen kiss with Bowie...smirk).

But anyways, you feel his love for her.

Unfortunately- she is a selfish, spoiled brat whose main advantage is that she is a plucky heroine, has a vivid imagination, is very beautiful but refuses to date cause boys are icky, wants to remain a child, hates her new stepmom and her half brother, and really misses her mom (who passed away or is away for good).

Hmmm I'm starting to see why this film meant so much to me when I was in my preteens especially.

Ok so anyways, one night when she is fed up with babysitting and wants to be the baby not take care of the whiny brat that is her baby bro, she makes up a story. Only, the Goblin King had fallen in love with her and given her the power of the wish. Fairies are not villians but they are sneaky little bastards with poor human social skills, and Sarah makes the stupid wish that the fictional...or so she thinks...king of the Goblins will get rid of her baby bro so she can go play and be irresponsible.

Unfortunately- the" I wish" does it.

Apparently the rules of fairytales.

Jareth appears, in sexy cape, criminally tight pants, too much fun glitter, with an army of muppet-goblins (yay for Jim Henson) and.

Tells her that if she ever wants to see her brother again she has to survive the Labyrinth of the Faerie realm - The Underground- and reach his Goblin Kingdom within 13 (magical number) hours or else Jareth is gonna adopt the baby brother to be his heir and she can say bye bye to them both forever.

So basically, she is screwed, cause stepmom will be super pissed and dad will eventually come home.

Jareth realizes one flook in his plan.....

Sarah told the story in a manner that made him the villain of the piece, and he is a selfish pretty boy guy, but he is now trapped to fulfill the role of the villian cause that's how she told Tobey, baby bro, the story...poor shmuck. Throughout the film this dual personailty will come into play- sometimes he'll try to step out of the role to plead with Sarah to be his b.d.s.m.ish bride and raise her brother with him there...he's actually really nice to the baby all things considering...what other potential boyfriend will pretty much take care of your whiney brat while you go out adventuring in fairyland?...but alas, he has to fulfill the role of the villian although he knows that villains go down. So the antihero waits it out in his castle, sometimes does shitty things (he's not perfect) and hopes she'll see past the facade someday while waiting for the final film confrontation. Bowie steals the show in this film.

Sarah enters the Labyrinth (most amazing set design ever- real sets not CGI thank God!) and meets some friendly muppet-outcasts along the way who help her on her quest. She matures and grows up a bit emotionally (realizing she was shitty to her baby bro and that she has to take up her actions and be the heroine, and possibly kick the male villain in the crystal balls).

And she makes it to the showdown.

I won't tell the rest since you have to see it. Depending on which of the 2 main characters (the only human figures in this muppet crazy world) perspective' you are relating to or looking at, you can either sympathize or black and white hate whomever. Both are imperfect, parralels of each other:

Selfish, magic obsessed, hopeless romantics with renaissance fair fetishes, but also good at heart- although both play antiheroes and eventually fulfill their roles as: humbled villian and all-grown-up-feminist-heroine.

The end gives a bitter sweet nod to what could have been between them (and the lyrics of the final song gives hopes to lovers of weird-but-straight-fantasy-romance) but as each character heads out into the night to party or to dissapear behind the moon, the viewer is left with the wonder of it all...

....Or trauma from the 80'sness of it all- depending on if you like it for its childishness, it's grownup- heavy-psychoanalytical depth (film students write papers on it), or just plain music video fun.

This movie launched Jennifer Connelly's young cult career ("A Beautiful Mind" got her the Oscar when her career needed a reboot into money-making-franchise territory).

She's still gorgeous now. Bowie is sexy voiced but alas, old...er (although until his late 50's the man was still jumpable- he always looked young for his age).

And although there is no second film.....sigh...if they redid it now they would just ruin it, it is kinda done.

There are loads of comics on the web as well as fanfic to continue it.

Enjoy it for it's originality!