Review of Knock Knock (2015) by Dobian — 22 Nov 2020

This is possibly the worst Netflix movie I have ever seen. I give it one point because the girls are sexy, especially Bell. The rest is drek. I lost count of the number of times Keanu Reeves could have overpowered these two skinny girly-girls and gotten out of his predicament.

At one point he is taken down by a dinner fork to his upper pectoral and subdued. By a 115 pound chick. Yes, you heard that right. I won't even mention the other ridiculous moments where his character responds so pathetically when opportunity arises that you stop rooting for him.

The plot is so poorly written, they had to build plot armor around the two female sociopath antagonists by having Keanu's character repeatedly fail in the lamest of ways. Add to that the horribly written dialogue, where Keanu is still trying to morally defend himself late in the story to a couple of giggling and deranged psychos, the fact that these girls convince Keanu that they're underage after sleeping with him, when they are clearly in their twenties, and scenes of them gleefully trashing the house like a couple of cheerleaders on crack, and you have a very bad comedy posing as a thriller.

The scene with a would-be rescuer had me watching dumbfounded at its stupidity at how they got the better of him, not to mention how he inexplicably stops untying Keanu halfway through to confront the girls alone.

Then we see the girls dig a professional-looking rectangular hole in the backyard nearly six feet deep using two shovels and their spindly arms. They must really work out. Of course we find out at the end that these girls do this home invasion to married men all over, and somehow manage to get away with it despite leaving a trail of destruction and even bodies in their wake, along with a weak jab at the male patriarchy that the guys have this coming for being such pervs that when naked twenty-somethings start groping them, the guy stops resisting.

We never learn what motivates these girls and why they feel the need to punish husbands and fathers, only that the blonde one has clear daddy issues. To even suggest that this is a "pyschological" thriller when the psychological component is so poorly developed is an insult to psychological thrillers.

This movie might have worked if it made fun of itself and was deliberately campy, like the entertaining Babysitter films, but it doesn't. From the bad writing, poorly scripted action, and sketchy moral message, Knock Knock fails on every level.