Review of Jurassic World (2015) by Kenchun24 — 13 Jun 2015

Jurassic World was...pretty mediocre. Okay while watching it, quite stupid when thinking about it and talking about the movies missteps with friends afterwards. It's basically Universal Studios doing a re-boot trilogy thingy with a nostalgic Millennials movie franchise. In 1993 I took my younger sister to see JP when she was 8 years old. So she is the target audience for this fourth "Dinos In Park Run Wild" effort. Even though 22 years later we both still know that the original is still the best, and that all of the sequels (including this one) are pretty meh.

It's got product placement up the yin-yang from every nook and cranny. I laughed several times at the "unintentional comedy" via bits of dialogue and paper thin performances that were very, VERY dumb. You can tell this movie was "Pre-vized & action set pieced" worked months before a page of script was written. You can also tell the age range of commenters with what they perceive as "deep or interesting" character wise simply from the limited knowledge within their posts. A whole generation raised on Bayformer eye candy crap with weak script writing...and it shows.

And while JWorld was an enjoyable B level monster movie and THAT's ALL, nothing more - just like Jeremy Jahns, Chris Stuckmann, and Rotten Tomatoes all rated it - it has several moments of Micheal Bay level stupidity in the script that folks are giving a pass on because of the JP brand and nostalgia of Spielberg's classic. But I call it like I see it. Jurassic World is just another pure cash grab action sequel, like the much hated Jurassic Park 3 was, and nothing was advanced for this same story told 4 times over now. Even the ending of JWorld was the SAME ending of the first film and the third film, except with MORE MORE MORE.

If you listen to Colin Trevorrow's interview with the Schmoes Know Movies crew, he even admits that the movie had to hit certain studio influenced beats while in production, and that's lame. You should be trying to make the best movie possible no matter what (and maybe Colin did try to do that as this movie reeks of many studio/producer cooks in the kitchen). So to me, the bar should have been set at making a movie as good as JP '93. Not "We're just gonna aim for barely better JP 3 and arguably on pas with The Lost World.

Not settling for the usual "Include kids because kids need to relate, include military and a divorce story because domestic audiences are familiar with these tropes, redo the final battle of JP '93 but add more beasties because more equal better" etc. One more thing. I did a re-watch of all three JP films and I gotta say that the visual FX in Jurassic World, in 2015, are really not that special compared to it's first two cousins. Also, folks rag on JP3, but at least Joe Johnston tried to make animatronic Dino-baddies for its 3rd act showdown with the Spinosaurus Rex & Raptors.

After thinking about the movie, a proper poster tagline for this flick should have read:

"Jurassic World: The Park Is Open, But Only Dumb People Are Invited...please buy Bose, Starbucks, Mercedes Benz etc etc etc products on your way out.