Review of Jurassic World (2015) by Darthfronz85 — 21 Oct 2015

This movie follows the exact same formula as the first movie: Expert is called to the park to give a green light to a particular aspect of the park, two kids are left under the questionable supervision of people who are not paying them any particular attention, and surprise! A large carnivore escapes and causes all sorts of chaos.

The movie is bigger than the original: More dinosaurs escape, more people are in the park when it happens, and CG is overused with reckless abandon. Obvious nods to the first JP are milestones separated by groan-worthy story arcs (the two boys with the unhappy parents could have just not been in the movie and nothing would have changed, yet we're forced through awkward minutes of them discussing their parents' impending divorce) and are shoehorned in with such frequency that one could easily believe this movie is nothing more than a cash-in.

Moments like these lead to one which took me out of the movie entirely, like one where the jeeps from the first park are made to run using twenty year old gasoline, oil, and batteries. Sorry, Jurassic World, not in this or any reality.

The movie culminates in a grand climax that is ruined when a t-rex and a velociraptor give each other a 's'up bro' nod afterward instead of attempting to kill one another as they should have. This movie is potato chips: Everyone bought it but no one came away with any substance.