Review of Jurassic World (2015) by Bo33Y — 09 Sep 2015

Somebody on something really stupid has made something else absolutely brainless. Where to begin? This film's absurdity doesn't even begin connecting every other synonym, describing the disaster seen. Do people this silly, really think that when making TV a franchise might cough up some numbers here? Entertainment often comes from a functioning story executing excitement throughout the ride invested, than we will go out and purchase, watching again. Not because somebody thinks hmm any braindead will buy into their brands.

What action and CGI? The action throughout this film was constantly repeated shown by that same Trex yawning. Seriously though the action shown, looked like some kind of 50's playdo. Otherwise those cave people in their thongs escaping from all of the other scary beasts. However those cave people often came from much better plots than this film's tripe.

Do us all a favour and think next time? If your making a Dolly the dinosaur clone just put a lethal kill switche inside of it's brain, popping when that beast even starts to show signs of escape. Not some kind of a tracker it can claw out? I mean dinosaurs just love scratching their heads, figuring all kind of ways to prison break and release all of the other most wanted inmates, the Pterodatyls. Wait the film gets way better when the cloned dinosaur was combined with every other venomous species of DNA, and it started communicating on Dr. Moreau's island to all of the domesticated military grade raptors, who were also trained as sniffer dogs for whatever drugs that these producers are using. Instead of it's DNA exploding from functioning like Platypus. Anyhow evil Dolly the Trex becomes leader of the pack, saying kill ze humans, hail your new cloned leader, quickly escape get some take away their are some real tasty humans. Although the raptors are all torn emotionally between their loyalty, seen in some kind of puppy love. RPG's have failed to kill any of the beasts. They decide to release a real Trex instead, for the Trex mating ritual of all the teeth and claws, even the little baby raptor decides to join in. Finally later Crocasharkosaur back flips out of the aquarium, impossibly, because it really should have been feasting on all the tourists previously., I mean evolve. I guess it had gotten super hungry becauce it was bigger with the fins that tried to evolve into feet, and any mosquitoes love the ocean salt, a home to all kind of amber. Finally the good animals have won, helping the humans escape their failed amusements.

Somewhere else glass balls stop thousand of tonnes of weight, because glass must be all kind of unbreakable. Rhinosaurs were only herbivores anyway, meaning they cannot see red. Anyhow our heroes walk on under, right on through earthquakes. A Richter scale with thousands of tonnes stomping and crashing would see people flying through air throughout that rampage. The human heroes like their dinosaurs counterparts were completely RPG proof.

Crichton knew that the park would never re-open to the public. Why did these producers think to franchise this stupidity? Stupidity seen in complete and utter devolution on everything else previous.