Review of Jaws 3-D (1983) by J.d. N — 23 Mar 2010
The third installment of the Jaws franchise followed a path several other horror franchises took in the 80's with their third entries - they made the movie in 3-D. Watching this movie without 3-D is almost the only way to do so on DVD or TV, and the resulting effects are just awful beyond words. I managed to see this movie one time in 3-D and the effects resulting from that experience...are still awful beyond words. The shark manages to do things that not can sharks not do, but are impossible for anything to do. In one scene near the end, the shark (which in standard viewing looks like a cardboard cutout) smashes into an observatory. A worker hides behind something on the opposite end of the room from where the shark entered. Somehow, the shark slinks past objects, seizes the worker, and chews him up - all without having more than its head inside the observatory. The story: Sea World in Florida (which is somehow near the ocean despite being in landlocked Orlando) finds a baby great white shark and decides to display it (They must need something else to attack trainers and bums.), where it promptly dies. This is somehow detected by its mother, who invades the park and wreaks havoc. Dennis Quaid stars, though I'm sure this movie doesn't make his resume any longer, as Brody's grown-up son, and Lea Thompson and Louis Gossett Jr (Gordon from Sesame Street) also appear. Big deal - no casting choices could save this movie from the ridiculous story, plot holes, geographic errors, and lousy effects. The one thing that does stand out is that the behavior of the young shark in its tank mirrored previous attempts to keep this species in captivity (It wasn't until this past decade that a great white was successfully kept in captivity for any length of time at the Monterrey Bay Aquarium.). That lone fact-based part of the story is what saves this from a complete poor score; plus the attempt at 3-D effects is to be lauded as it was all the rage in the 80's, wonderful Reagan-filled era that it was...
My rating: D+ / 1 star.
This review of Jaws 3-D (1983) was written by J.d. N on 23 Mar 2010.
Jaws 3-D has generally received negative reviews.
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