Review of Intermission (2003) by Bryan G — 18 Aug 2004

Hey, I am in severe depression today. I just started shouting at my dad there for no reason. Life just seems like one big joke to me. I'm fed up with fucking everything. I just seem to be stuck in this rut, and there's no escape. There's no escaping the life I've made for myself. I just feel like a loser or something. I don't know what it is. I don't think everyone looks at me and thinks, "What a loser". I don't know what they think really. But it's what I think that counts, because I'm the only person who has to live with myself 24/7. Do you know what I'm saying? I just feel like I'm not doing enough. My self esteem is pretty miserable at the moment. I don't even feel like people hate me, so why should it be low? I just can't understand myself. Why do I feel so bloody insignificant all the time, so undeserving? I look around me, and I feel disgusted at people. I'm angry that I can't voice my opinions without somebody taking me up the wrong way. I'm angry because I can't stop eating. I'm angry because I don't want to be a stick figure, and yet then in some people's eyes, that's the only desirable way to be. I'm angry because there is always somebody there, bitching about you, mocking you, ignoring you. I'm angry because quite frequently I am that person. I'm happy that I'm getting all of this shit out of my system. I'm angry because I can't stop spewing my guts out to people, which nearly always ends in disaster. I'm angry because other people are happier than I am. I'm angry because some people have it so easy. I'm angry that I'm an angry and jealous and miserable person. I'm angry that I feel like a phonie sometimes. Sigh. I'm angry that I've never loved anybody in my life yet. I'm angry that I've found people who I thought I could love, but it never worked out. I'm angry that I never seem to be the right age, that it never seems to be the right time. I'm angry that I'm worried about tomorrow, that I'm letting something as stupid as that control my life. I'm happy because I am going shopping tomorrow, and I hope and pray that the really lovely dress/top I saw will still be there. I'm happy because somebody said I looked thin the other day. I'm happy because people said I looked pretty. I'm unhappy because I never feel pretty enough (except for that one night).

On a side note, [I]Intermission [/I] is savage. All should watch it.