Review of Inferno (2016) by André L — 04 Nov 2016

When a sequel is greenlit, it's usually fulfills one of the following criteria: 1) the continuing of a larger story; 2) the longing to spend more time with characters who are unique, compelling, familiar, or funny. These Langdon films, based on the Dan Brown novels, have neither. Instead, after 3 entries in the religious conspiracy series, it's becoming clear that they're just an excuse for Howard and Hanks to travel to beautiful foreign locales and crap out a movie while there. Inferno continues this trend with 2 hours of colorlessly somber adults, delivering colorlessly somber dialogue, within a colorlessly somber plot.

If you haven't seen Da Vinci Code or Angels & Demons, don't worry; they're all soulless, basically the same, and have no story-ties to one another. The normally dependable Hanks continues his flaccid performance as the dull and completely un-empathetic Langdon, spouting constant exposition with the passion of a drowsy tollbooth worker.

It's perfectly telling that this movie treats discovering a hidden anagram like an exciting car chase, musical-score boost and all. Most of this "thriller" is stupid character decisions, plot contrivances, and flimsy conspiracy maps that even an illuminati-obsessed YouTuber would roll their eyes at.

I don't get it, these are talented people. Franchise newcomers Foster and Jones do their best to portray compelling characters, Hanks is (normally) at least likable, and Howard has some nice visual moments. But with Hell or High Water, Rogue One, Sully, and Eight Days a Week, their all involved in much more interesting projects this year. So when Jones' character quips, "It's nice to have you back, professor.", let's make something clear: "No. It's really not.".