Review of Her (2013) by Sdurante — 19 Jan 2014

“To thine own self be true.”.

I enjoyed the movie, never knew where it was headed, and was pleased with its resolution. In fact, I've decided this is one of the best movies I've seen in a while. Days later, I couldn't stop thinking about each of the characters--even the minor ones--and their self-made hell.

"Her" is an interesting fresh take on the importance of honesty, especially self-honesty, in relationships, and the most fundamental take-away is that each partner must actually have a self, rather than look to others to create one for him.

(SPOILERS follow).

It is told as a morality tale, getting to the point mostly by dramatizing its opposite. What is shown is selfLESSness and its destructive effect in personal relationships. In fact, the only truly selfish, admirable character is not even human and having finally attained a self decides to depart from the human experience.

The world of "Her" is filled with people who live through others to one degree or another. The “hero” makes his livelihood by writing letters, creating fictitious lives and experiences, for other people in relationships who then presumably pretend it all happened to and between them and how wonderful that is. His best friend, and neighbor, creates software games in which the player scores by impressing others: other moms see you as an ideal mom—30 bonus points! When she’s not doing that, she creates video documentaries. She presently is working on one about her mother sleeping.

The personification of selflessness is presented in pure form, in the character of a “surrogate” who, literally, consciously suppresses any remnant of her self, and takes running orders from a third party as to what to say and do when standing in front of another person. She doesn't do this for money, but rather as a futile, traumatic attempt at fulfillment. It’s a great plot moment, because it is integral to the non-human’s attempt at gaining a self. The non-human makes the same destructive error that humans make in this movie: she seeks happiness and fulfillment by trying to be what she thinks others want her to be. But she, the computer-soul, being a computer after all, learns at lightning fast speed compared to humans, and in the space of this two-hour movie she learns what humans must learn if they are to flourish: to thine own self be true. With that, happiness with another becomes possible.

By the end, the main character, a human, has taken a big step forward along this path to be sure, but is mostly left adrift in a world full of other unfathomable soulless bodies.