Review of Heartbreak Ridge (1955) by Robert C — 20 Aug 2009

Ughhhh. Firstly, I guess it's my fault for watching this all the way through but c'mon.... Eastwood.... in a war movie, it's bound to be good right? Wrong! When this movie isn't pretending its Sgt. Bilko it acts like a really cheap warm up act for Full Metal Jacket (released a year after this).... but you know without the grit/acting talent/story/direction/impact.

Secondly, I should have guessed what to expect by Clint thinking that if he said "US MARINE!" enough times audiences might actually take him seriously as one... instead of like some old guy who just really likes... you know... being a dick.

Long story short... Clint rides on his Dirty Harry persona (but this time he's a lovable-take-no-bull-shit war sergeant who has to whip into shape some off-the-rails but oh-so fun-loving-crazy mostly Black/Latino (???) definately camp individuals into American Marine cannon fodder. But ohhh it's not going to be easy as they try to make life hard for each other but you'll know eventually put aside those differences and grow (awww) under the cover of gunfire... well kind of. . Eastwood caries his troops through a shootout/battel type thing cos they're all shit!... and in the end captures 8 men. Count them. 8! Hardly fucking worth it really!

*Cue smoke machines and palm trees*.

"Yo gunnie man, I think Profile's dead" ... Who cares... I certainly don't!

Don't get me wrong I seriously admire Eastwood (and very much his later directorial attributes) but this movie is a poor effort, but to be fair.. the story is very weak and shouildn't have been green-lit. With performances so wooden; Warner Brothers should have saved salaries through hiring mannequins for pretty much the same effect. Bad story and bad acting means the characters are one-dimensional if that and by the end of the film you wish they'd all just died,... and you'll be surprised they didn't as they couldn't shoot for shit.

Not Fun. Not Serious. But the distinct impression that the movie wanted oh so badly to be both... FAILS.

On this occasion.... Poor Show Clint Old Chap.

Tacky, Tacky PAP!