Review of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (2005) by Yawnbumblebore — 19 Nov 2005

[***SPOILERS***] 10 for special effects, zero for plot, which works out (rather charitably, I think) to a 5. Visually, this is a spectacular film. But visuals should always be in the service of a film's story line; not the other way around, and this film's plot was a shambles.

The film had scenes and events that contributed absolutely nothing to the story., entire plot lines developed halfway and then rudely abandoned. Example: Harry's budding romance with some undistinguished girl that never either blossomed or died, but just sort of withered away of neglect, I guess, somewhere offscreen.

Example: The death of ------, which was unnecessary and had absolutely zero significance for the story line. The worst violation of form comes in what was evidently intended to be the film's climactic moment: Harry's great encounter with the arch-villain Waldemort.

This is a joke, with Harry and W. spraying streams of sparks at each other from their wands in some kind of an adolescent Wiz contest, then abruptly stopping so that Harry can exit stage left. Nothing ever comes of this scene; dramatically and plot-wise it is a big unresolved hole that the characters blithely ignore right up to the end of the film like the proverbial elephant in the room.

Someone has *got* to be paying at least *some* of these reviewers for the inflated ratings that I see posted on this site. And the rest of you are, I don't know, some kind of J.K. Rowling sycophants.

But, hey, the kids in the audience where I saw it absolutely loved it, so maybe I'm the one whose clock needs adjusting.. All I can say is, if you are willing to completely suspend all critical thinking and just immerse yourself in right-brain activity, you should definitely see this film; otherwise, stay far away.