Review of Godzilla (2014) by Nathan R — 13 Jun 2015

Please explain to me why romance needs to be involved in every single American film. I already knew the main character and his wife with little-to-no personality would make it out fine.

Look, when I see a Godzilla movie... I want GODZILLA. I don't want to watch sniveling humans whine about their inner turmoil. I want to see giant monsters FIGHT. For a movie called "Godzillla," the world's favorite monster was barely in this movie. Twelve minutes of humans whimpering, quick shot of some new monster destroying cities. Not Cloverfield quick, but still dissatisfying. Almost all shots of the monsters were at night, and in the dark, and you could barely see them. Who fucking thought to do that?!

On the plus side however... it's a great comeback for Godzilla. When he finally hits the screen, you want to cheer. He just looks so badass. And I have to say that going into this movie, I didn't expect there to be brand new monsters for him to fight. I hear that an upcoming Godzilla movie scheduled for 2018, and it will feature some big names of the monster world we all know and love, like Mothra, Rodan, and kickass Ghidora! Now that's something I can't wait to see.

Though I was extremely dissapointed that Godzilla's appearance was way, WAY too late in this film, and while it did help to build tension, it was boring to sit and wait through every human's plight. Like, just get to Godzilla and make the monsters fight, for the love of...

The fight sequence at the end between Godzilla and the MUTOs was the epic battle I had waited the whole movie to see, and it was worth the wait. Though it was tough to see because it was all made in the damn dark... but when Godzilla went Firin' His La-zor, it was one of those fist-pumping moments that hardly come to me these days. I literally screamed YEEEEAH!

The MUTOs were also a very cool design, and the concept of them blasting everything with EMP shockwaves was a clever one. It meant that not even humans could attempt to fight them, and in the end, it worked to state that it was Godzilla's responsibility to take them out once and for all. The build-up of the reveal of the MUTO male was also intense. It was brilliantly done.

With that aside, again... I didn't care about the human characters. Everything about them was generic and plain. I know that this young guy is going to be okay in the end. You don't have to create suspense on whether or not he's going to survive. The main male hero almost never dies. If he died, I'd give it five stars just for going out of the box for once. Or if his wife died, which we all knew she wouldn't. Come on, this is American cinema.

Godzilla was worth it, though. If you're a fan of the classic Godzilla films, and you want a taste of the updated version of him and see him duke it out with two other beasts, definitely give this a watch. Just... skip through the human shit.

Like every other Godzilla film. But I know... the movie needs to be longer than thirty minutes, and we all know that Godzilla, King of Monsters would blast anything away in five seconds. So, I understand.