Review of Garfield (2004) by Buddy A — 09 Sep 2012

RETRO REVIEW.

"Garfield" is a ruination of a delightful comic strip and it was one of the worst movies of 2004. I really did loathe the film with all my soul; that being because I read the comic strips every Sunday and was looking forward to seeing them played out on the silver screen, but they are instead fizzled out by a stupid screenplay, an annoying Bill Murray (who was perfect FOR the role of Garfield but who is not perfect IN the role) voiceover, uninspired performances from both Breckin Meyer (who is nothing like the Jon I imagined) and Jennifer Love Hewitt (who is not Liz--period), and the utter disregard of the filmmakers to make a good movie. How the hell could they not? The Garfield that I know is a fat cat that eats lasagna, pokes a hot dog from under his blanket when Jon tries to wake him with false warnings of a house fire, and turns on the hot water while Jon is in the shower. That's all funny; the crap that is jammed into this movie is not (although the shower joke is thrown in, this time with Garfield flushing the toilet while Jon is bathing, which makes the scene all the more creepy because we realize that Garfield, a talking male cat, was watching Jon shower). The premise was simple but could have worked, which makes it even more confusing. The whole idea behind the movie is that Odie, Jon's new pet dog, is dog-napped and Garfield must save him. As fans of the comics know, Garfield does not like Odie but has to put up with him. In desperate times even, Garfield might go to his wit's end to save Odie. TADA! Psych. Instead of playing on these obvious emotionally effective ideas, the filmmakers, who are lazier than Garfield himself, decided to throw in a dumbass plot in which nobody really cares if Odie is saved from a man named Happy Chapman (yes, that's his name, and he's played horribly by Stephen Tobolowsky) who is using the dog's tricks to gain ratings for his lackluster show. The movie is supposed to also be aimed at children, yet we get shock treatment on Odie from Happy and Garfield threatening to hang himself. While I'm not a father, I wouldn't want my children asking me what the meaning of "hanging themselves" is. This is a small gripe amongst a lot of my big, BIG gripes about the movie. It is an utter waste of space and not worth a dime or damn. "Heck nah.".

Critics who agree:

Ty Burr, Boston Globe: "Maybe I'm being unkind; a black-dressing young intellectual of my acquaintance recently ascribed a "lazy generosity" to Garfield and his daily antics. If so, the movie gets the laziness but misses the generosity. 1 star.".

David Sterritt, Christian Science Monitor: "The blend of live action and animation is competently done, but the subtly mean-spirited screenplay has more sour meows than hearty laughs. 1 star.".

Dana Stevens, The New York Times: "Here's something [crazy]: someone at 20th Century Fox has decided that "Garfield," Jim Davis's long-running syndicated comic strip, tolerated by millions of newspaper readers around the world, should be adapted into a movie. 20 out of 100.".

Manohla Dargis, Los Angeles Times: "Too bad Garfield couldn't just stay on the comics page. 20 out of 100.".