Review of Footloose (1984) by Abby E — 13 Oct 2012

This sounded like a good movie. The concept is great, and if it had followed through on the plot, I would have loved it. But, alas: it sucked, and here's why.

For starters, Lori Singer's character. She's supposed to be a "rebellious" teen, who is just trying to be herself without the interference of her tyrannical father. But there is a fine line between a character being "rebellious" and "out-of-control". And it's apparent almost immediately with the opening scene of her climbing from the window of one speeding car to another that she's the latter. Her character is highly annoying: whether she's delivering cheesy lines or beating up her ex-boyfriend, you can't help but to really hate her. And then there's the problem of her brother: her brother died after drunk driving and reckless behaviour, but instead of honouring her brother's death, she doesn't really seem to care and just goes along doing the same things that got him killed and the law against dancing written in the first place. Seriously, she has no concern for the fact that her brother is dead and seems only to care about breaking as many rules and kissing as many guys as she can.

Then there's the fact that even though this movie is supposed to be about dancing, there is absolutely no dancing in the entire film except for at the very, very end. Well, except for that scene where Kevin Bacon is doing a strange mix of martial arts and gymnastics in some old warehouse. What's that about?

Almost literally, this entire movie is comprised of nothing at all but teenagers doing stupid things. Not halfway through the movie, they go to a bar and get hammered, then a few minutes later they're playing "Chicken" with tractors. Yes, you read that right: TRACTORS.

The only redeeming moment is when Kevin Bacon gives that big speech on dancing for the town council. But here's the problem: he says that the dancing they wish to do is in "celebration of life", and not to go crazy and get drunk. But it's apparent from the previous hour and a half of film that that statement is a total lie. So really, the film had no moral lesson other than that stupid people do really stupid things. And that everyone in this town is stupid.

Why this film is so iconic I have no idea. I gave it two stars because I love the 80's. But this movie sucked. Please don't waste two hours of your life on it. I'm begging you.