Review of Fifty Shades Freed (2018) by Digitaladdict1 — 24 Feb 2018

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Fifty Shades Freed is the third and final installment of the book to movie adaption of the same name. Fifty Shades Freed is one of those movies that most single guys would never be caught dead watching and if they are it’s a guilty pleasure they should probably keep to themselves. But when you are married or in a relationship then you know why we have to do our part and succumb to Hollywood's clever marketing along with its Valentine’s Day week releases for getting women to see these movies. So to sum up the plot real quick. Fifty shades free is Sappy Love story for 5 minutes, softcore porn, Marital Strife, softcore porn, car chase, softcore porn, evil people, softcore porn, everyone is happy, and more softcore porn. So even if you do take your Significant other to see this movie there are definitely things to satisfy both parties erotic side and if your into seeing a lot of nipples and women licking ice cream off of mans bush, then this movie is definitely for you. Lets just say never trust a man who has drawers lined with perfectly placed vibrators and butt plugs. But lets go into more detail about….other things. The movie follows up Fifty Shades Darker with Anastasia played by Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan reprising his role as Christian grey. Freed starts off with them getting married and then onto a bunch of very scenic shots of them traveling Europe for what we can assume is their honeymoon. Their vacation is cut short due to an incident at Mr. Grey's business where they quickly reveal the perpetrator is Anastasias old boss/stalker Jack Hyde. Jack seems to have some kind of vengeance out for Christian and you find out why later in the movie. Most of the movie is filled with the obvious fact that now that christian has the woman he wants, he has a huge issue with jealousy. Anastasia likes to go against christians will and do things her way and in turn…. You guessed it, more softcore porn, only this time its for annas punishment. This also goes for anastasia towards christian for example their architect for their new home is awfully touchy and anastasia quickly puts an end to it by throwing her newly aquired power around. Throughout the movie you quickly see anna start to break out of her shell and rebel. The acting and screenwriting in this movie is just as you would expect. Cheesy, sappy, and just plain akward. But it works. Dornan's acting reminds me of Hayden Christensen's in the New star wars trilogy. A laughable character in the movie is one of the Grey's bodyguards Sawyer. I don’t know if this screenplay was written for him to look like a robot or its his acting but he reminds you of the t1000 from terminator. I guess that’s a good thing if you are paying for him to protect you though. The only one that gets full credit here is Dakota Johnson as she does a great job in this film and definitely would be someone I would like to see on screen again… and no not just because of her boobs.

The movie has a great upbeat soundtrack and actually moves at a pretty good pace if you can put up with the terrible story and characters. If you are into such a far fetched fantasy where you can let your wife or girlfriend drive your heavily advertised Audio R8 and she instantly becomes a stunt car driver that then follows that up with being so turned on that after being chased by a bad guy she has to **** you in the first parking space she finds, then you will love this movie. For the majority of us this movie is definitely passable. But seeing that they keep releasing these on valentines day it is our duty as men to take our woman to see these films. The only good thing is that these books and movies were written with one thing in mind and if your lucky, you may get lucky if you know what I mean.