Review of Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007) by Harry W — 15 Sep 2015

There are so many things wrong with this film. I realize that this film is/was geared for a certain demographic. They need(ed) the gags to appeal to that form of brain-death...

What a shame.

Still, why they didn't clear that bridge, the amusement park, the buildings nearby, etc., in London, over & next to the Thames, of ppl, vehicles, etc., as they knew very well that the Surfer was due to be there, as the mathematical calculations that determined the precise location of the next crater were accurate...& they were right, makes no sense. They had plenty of time to evacuate the area and every reason to do so, given as they could not have known that the Surfer wasn't doing anything other than what he had already been doing, creating those craters, & that the end of the world, though impending, just was not imminent. Not evacuating the area implies shitty writing. And/or really stupid characters.

And while astronomers & astrophysicists could've used all of the different telescopes available to them to figure out that this immensely massive thing, i.e., Galactus, who by then was well inside our solar system...

(I wonder how many other ppl realize/remember that Galactus's ship is supposed to be the size of a solar system! Being something of a traditionalist, I would've preferred it if they had shown it...in full. Though, if his ship is the size of our solar system, for example, then, what would he do to reach the Earth... Park on top of our solar system, perhaps, as opposed to flying right up, through the side, through the Kypher Belt?! Unless Galactus parked his ship outside of our solar system, he would have, more or less entirely, destroyed the Oort Cloud, which surrounds our entire solar system. He could have done that to our entire solar system. Come to think of it, I don't believe that they ever explained, in the comics or in/on any film, why Galactus didn't consume whole Sun's...).

Maybe it would have been to difficult for them to show all that stuff, evacuating a portion of London, large & multiple types of industrial infrastructure & technology, etc. A certain amount of infrastructure & technology was seen in the film and I heard that `Faux` was a crybaby about the budget...

Maybe this movie sucks & no amount of money could have saved it!

Tim Story, Don Payne and Avi Arad have the worst talking/narrating voices. WTF-ever made the decision to include those three deaf-sounding idiots to the audio commentary should lose their job(s). Real fast. And save Marvel from any further & future embarrassment. In particularly, Tim Story sounds like he has throat cancer. Don Payne is so monotone that he could put a crack-head to sleep. And Avi Arad sounds like he should throwing rocks at Israeli tanks, screaming something in Arabic...

I think the DVD extras actually made me dislike this film more, than how much I would have not liked it if I had never encountered them.