Review of Drive Angry (2011) by Autitakahashi — 25 Jan 2013

"Drive Angry" is a grindhouse movie about fast cars, killer coins, mutilated bodies, bullet holes, bad accents, human sacrifices, Satan, Satan's worshippers, Satan's Accountant, and a few conversations about slitting the throat of an infant so Hell could move up to Earth and party. Find anything that could offend you?

The star is Nicolas Cage. His choice of movies in recent years has been, questionable. Either he's been testing the range of his acting skills, or he's only been agreeing to do certain movies that require him to have a weird haircut. That man's hair has had more alterations than a teenager. After "Season of the Witch" and "Drive Angry", it's now safe to say that Mr. Cage needs to hire a new stylist as much as he needs to hire a new agent. Anyway.

Cage plays a dead, angry, blonde man named John Milton. Don't ask. His daughter has been brutally murdered by a satanic cult, and plans to execute her baby while they drink beer. Milton, who is in Hell, is not happy. (And that's not just because he's in Hell.) Pissed off and ready to kick some living ass, he steals Satan's special gun and makes his way back to earth in a car. (It's probably Satan's, too.) His actions are constantly monitored by the Accountant, who is the film's most interesting aspect. Abstrusely played by William Fichtner, the Accountant, fresh from the Underworld, is a silent, well-dressed assassin with physical abilities beyond human. So, in short, he is The Terminator from Hell.

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