Review of Doom (2005) by Thomas D — 30 Oct 2010

As Halloween closes in, decisions start to become frantic. Which horror movie should I watch? There are so many of them. Well, for some idiotic reason I chose to watch 'DOOM'. 'Doom' is a sci-fi/ horror/ action movie that is loosely based on the once popular, first-person shooter computer game, 'Doom' made by ID Software. It was a huge hit back in the early nineties. Sadly, the movie was not a huge hit when it came out like the game was, proving once again that video game's make truly shitty movies. Maybe if they get some good story based game titles like 'Zelda' or 'Metroid' turned into some movies, the video game to good movie ratio might get a little better. The problem is, many of these producers and writers are trying to turn pointless, first-person shooters into movies. Sure, grab the games with the "least" amount of plot possible.

-Here are a few reasons why I did not like the movie 'Doom'. #1, when the Rock is one of the main characters, you know right then and there that the movie is slightly corny. I just don't think that wrestlers make good stars. #2, If you turn something like Doom into a movie, it should follow the plot a bit more for us overzealous fans. I always remember in the games that the demons you were blasting were actually demons from Hell that are entering through the portal and roaming around the base, not genetically mutated scientists!! If I wanted to see that shit, I would just throw in 'Resident Evil'! I can't believe these writers try to write off every fathomable mystery of horror by explaining that a 'deadly virus' is the cause or the reason behind the chaos. I hate that!!

-Overall, 'Doom' was very crappy, and campy, but it actually isn't the worst movie around. For being loosely based on the game, it did have quite a few good homages and references to its original format. It contained some nice first-person camera views that were much in style of the old game. It actually had a few cool looking demons also. It referenced many of the original, cool weapons from the game like the BFG and the chainsaw. I also must say that I liked the sets that were used for the base, it was about as good as you could make a setting for a 'Doom' movie. I also really liked the fight between that tough ass black dude and the huge beast in that prisoner pit with the electric walls!! That was a hardcore fight! I think what really threw the movie off for me was the stupid characters, the lame back story for the main character John "Reaper" who ironically has the last name Grim, go figure. Mainly I just hated the poor write-off of the evil demons being genetic mutations and all of that horseshit about the #24 chromosome, that was just so cliche and un-creative like 'Resident Evil'. It just sort of made the whole thing less 'Hellish' compared to the game where the marine is clearly fighting off foul, abominations of Hell like the 'Cyberdemon' or the 'Spider-Demon' neither of which can be found anywhere here in the watered down movie. It is because of these campy, shitty attributes that I included 'Doom' into my Horror-Fest line-up. Plus think about it, if you were stranded in a dark research facility on Mars with mutated monsters running around, you would probably be kind of scared. There are a few good scenes, lots of poor dialog, lots of corny WWF wrestling moves and some pretty flubby looking beasts! Great stuff for Halloween time wouldn't you agree?

*wow it is now 1:49 am Mountain Time, Happy Halloween er'body!*.