Review of Don't Open Till Christmas (1984) by Justin A — 19 Dec 2014

It reminded me of a Christmas version of The New York Ripper. Only not as stylish, bad editing, more bizarre characters (as if they're not from this planet), and kind of boring at times. There isn't much memorable about this movie, but it has some classic bad movie tropes like dummies falling from high places, terrible acting, bad dialogue, and of course, genital mutilation (which comes across more hilarious in the movie than the words "genital mutilation" ever do).

There's just not much to say about this fairly basic slasher. It started off relatively promising, with a nice long shot from the killer's POV as he stalks a couple in a car. However, after like 50 dead Santas later I was getting tired of the movie. I wouldn't recommend it over Silent Night, Deadly Night as far as slasher Christmas movies, but if you want to look deeper into the well after that movie then Don't Open Till Christmas is worth checking out. If you hated Silent Night, Deadly Night because of the Christmas aspect and you still want to watch Don't Open Till Christmas then you're likely an idiot.