Review of Don't Go in the House (1979) by Loner Moves . — 15 Sep 2011

Donâ??t go in the House or you will be sorry that you did. No, nothing bad will happen to you, but you will sit there thinking â??I should have just gone drinkingâ??. I came upon this film through â??The Women in Dangerâ?? episode from film critics Roger Ebert and Gene Siskel from their show Sneak Previews.

I did not have a lot of hope, but did not mind watching this. The film is about a man that starts burning women alive after he realizes they are females just like his cruel mother. He picks some of them up and slaps a few and then burns them alive.

Donâ??t go in the House came about in 1980 after the slasher craze took off. It shares one important similarity with a couple of the slashers that came out in that year and that is they demonstrate violence against women.

I recently saw The Boogeyman and that film has a supernatural man who tears off the clothes of crying women. Take it to the next step and you have Donâ??t Answer the Phone where the guy slaps the women.

Slapping women ainâ??t your thing? Then Donâ??t go in the House is you choice because it burns them. Am I disturbed by this? No, Iâ??m use to it. The film pretty much rips Psycho a lot and is very incompetent.

However, the filmâ??s biggest fail is the internal logic within itself. The film could have at least been believable or be competent. Heck, the killer is very uninteresting because there is nothing scary about him although humorous.

The killer looks like the Bee Keeper from the Village People. The acting is really terrible and the body count is excruciatingly low. Come on, more naked burning chicks. I believe it was all about the filmâ??s cheapness that makes us have such a low body count.

Or, it could be the grudge factor. Whatâ??s that? Well, the film was written by three guys and there are three burned women. I believe the guys were so angry over their rejection that they decided to get them back by having them burned in Donâ??t go in the House.

Eh, it is time for me to go into the woods alone.