Review of Clerks II (2006) by Eric K — 28 Mar 2010

"Clerks II" is not for everyone. Kevin Smith's niche of greatness (please take note Kev, 'cause you've made a couple of lemons too) is that he is like the poet laureate of Gen X. Specifically, in "Clerks," he captured perfectly the essence, the feel, of coming of age in the grunge era.

I have a soft spot for his films in the same way that I imagine Baby Boomers react to reminiscences of Woodstock. I know. Sad. "Clerks," a story about two smart but slackish guys clowning around in the convenience store that they worked in, making fun of the customers, riffing off of pop culture, and listening to Alice In Chains, was my Woodstock.

Well, the truth is the truth. There was something about that time, and the world, that seemed so complicated and depressing; like life was a big joke but nobody else seemed to get it. Maybe every generation experiences some version of this.

Reaching the top meant becoming a soulless, homogeneous corporate automoton during the Reagan years, and by osmosis we came to resent success by the time it was our turn at bat. We were real, we saw through it all, and our brilliance was unappreciated.

We were Deep, and we wrote songs about Darkness, Truth, and Not Becoming One Of Them. Plus, we smoked weed and drank a lot. Kurt Cobain was our pop/punk poet, and Kevin Smith was our auteur. His first movie wasn't just culturally significant, it was really, really f^%king funny, which is why it ranks among my all-time favorites.

Now, the time has come for Randal and Dante, the first film's "heroes," to grow up. They're in their mid-30's, and they've moved on up from the convenience store to the fast-food joint, Mooby's.

Dante is finally on the verge of achieving the white-picket-fence-and-two-and-a-half-kids dream, thanks to his rich girlfriend and her generous father. He is leaving Jersey for sunny Florida. Randal is not happy; every screw-up needs a straight man.

Fortunately, there's an unbelievably sheltered Bible Kid who works there (one of the movie's funniest moments is when he explains why he has yet to get physical with his girlfriend); but alas, he has forsaken the True Trilogy ("Star Wars"); he is a "Lord Of The Rings" fan, and for Randal this will not do.

(I LOVE Randal's re-enactment of the "Rings" movies). Dante has also been diddling the restaurant's gorgeous, down-to-earth manager (Rosario Dawson), and of course everyone BUT Dante can see that he really belongs with her.

There are a lot of funny pop-culture take-downs, like last time (Randal has discovered the perverse pleasures of the internet...'nuff said). Jay and Silent Bob return triumphantly, dealing dope with a side of the Good Book and more of that creepy naked dance from "Silence Of The Lambs.

" Randal arranges the kind of going-away party for his friend that you would expect Randal to arrange. A lot of previously unspoken emotions come tumbling out; either the bestiality or the booze lubricates everybody's tongues (like I said: it ain't for everyone).

This takes some doing: Randal and Dante were raised on shock value, and they prize irony and cynicism above all else. But they both really want the same thing: success, on their own terms. Maybe that's what we were all looking for, all along.

It takes courage to admit that you don't really want to conquer the world; our generation was raised with the Madonna Success Stereotype Syndrome--- it's the pinnacle of money and adoration, or nothing at all.

In these movies, I feel like I've hung out with my friends Dante and Randal, but I also feel like I've shared their catharsis. As I've reached my thirties (OK, mid-thirties), I've begun to understand also that life isn't about accumulating status or conforming to imposed standards; nor is it about sulking over the silliness of the standards others would impose upon me.

"Clerks II" gets that ending just right for Dante and Randal, and I'm glad. The movie's a little too schmaltzy for a comedy, and too gross-out humorish for a drama, and not quite a classic like its predecessor, but then again that's its whole point.

You don't always have to Change The World. Maybe just making a funny, sweet little movie, or re-opening the Quick Stop with your best buddy and your best girl, is enough.