Review of Clash of the Titans (2010) by Jordan K — 30 Aug 2012

After reading the heinous reviews of the film I watched nearly a half hour ago, I can't believe they didn't like this film. I really can't. Maybe because so many nerds are complaining that this isn't like the 1981 piece of crap- people seriously choose a terrible movie with bad effects over the remake with awesome effects and good actors? God. Okay, so maybe the story can be messed up a little. So maybe the film wasn't PERFECT. No film is really perfect unless it's The Godfather or Citizen Kane.

Anyway, enough complaining. The plot is loosely based on the Greek myth of Perseus- His family dies when Zeus crashes their boat because he gets mad that some people are claiming war at the gods. Anyway, Perseus arrives at a party held by a king and queen and they brag that they're better than the gods. Hades comes in and tells everyone that he's so mad that he will release the Kraken (a sea creature that is pretty much impossible to kill) at a eclipse held in a matter of days. To make things worse, they have to sacrifice the King and Queen's daughter Andromeda. But the good news is that Perseus is the son of Zeus and has some godly powers that could kill the Kraken. Anyway, to prevent this from happening Perseus and his gang of a million people have to go and get the head of Medusa, bring it back, yadda yadda yadda. They go and get Medusa's head, in which, of course, they can't look at her eyes or she will turn them into stone. Of course they succeed and return home where the Kraken has already been released. Andromeda has already been tied up and sacrificed, too. Perseus goes to get the head of Medusa and he freezes the Kraken and then it's pretty much the end. Oh yeah, and there's a cheesy love sequence between Perseus and Andromeda at the end. Unneeded.

Like I said before there's some little flaws about the movie: It's a little too long and it's not one of those amazing movies you'll always remember. Then again neither is the 1981 piece of utter crap, either. Oh and for those haters of the film out there, just remember that one scene that poked fun at the owl from the 1981 version. Not the best scene, but eh, it works.