Review of Caveman (1981) by Alison O — 21 Jan 2006

Best in Show: Dennis Quaid.

One for the future: Dennis Quaid.

Stand-out scene: Merciful arrival of the closing titles.

Brainer or no-brainer: No brainer.

Stands up to one viewing or repeated?: One is too many.

DVD commentary any good?: n/a.

DVD.

A reviewer is quoted in Halliwell's Film Guide as saying something along the lines of "This movie is worth half an hour of anyone's time, unfortunately it goes on for an hour and a half". As someone who's harboured a crush on Dennis Quaid for two decades and counting i've spent that time seeking out his back catalogue wherever possible. This however, has slid straight to the bottom of the league table of movies of his i've seen, knocking Jaws 3 off the bottom. While in a purely surface way the sight of his scantily-clad 27 year-old body IS easy on the eye it's the relentlessly puerile story and shockingly poor (but not in an entertaining way) special effects that render this an absolute clunker. The writer/director Carl Gottlieb has since only directed in TV since and went on to work with Quaid again as the screenwriter on..guess what Jaws 3D! The premise is; Ringo Starr is a caveman, Dennis Quaid is his mate. The two are followed on a series of vignettes on the subject of prehistoric life. Starr and Barbara Bach - whose marriage endures to this day - met on the set of this movie, which also features an early appearance from Shelley Long. Its two points are awarded on the basis that it clearly doesn't take itself too seriously and on its own level as a harmless comedy it deserves at least a point. Any movie that casts Ringo Starr in the lead role isn't aiming high (he is to acting what Jade Goody/Jessica Simpson is to MENSA) and while it does trot out every cliche in the book BC-living wise I can see why some people may have developed an affection for it, but it's that kind of movie that polarises opinion. Dreadful, but still 2 whole points better than Star Wars Episodes 1 and 2 (not to mention the fireside scene that appears to have been filched wholesale for the climax of Return of the Jedi, made two years later).