Review of Cars 3 (2017) by Patrick L — 20 Oct 2017

"Cars 3 is neither fast or furious enough to match with Pixar's far better animated efforts".

Movie Review: Cars 3.

Date Viewed: June 17 2017.

Directed By Brian Fee.

Screenplay By Kiel Murray, Bob Peterson and Mike Rich, Story By Brian Fee, Ben Queen, Eval Powell and Jonathan E. Stewart.

Featuring the voices of Owen Wilson, Armie Hammer, Cristela Alonzo, Bonnie Hunt, Larry the Cable Guy, Chris Cooper, Nathan Fillion, Tony Shalhoub, Guido Quaroni, Lea DeLaria, John Ratzenberger, Lewis Hamilton, Kerry Washington, Darrell Waltrip, Bob Costas, Margo Martindale, Bob Peterson, Humpy Wheeler, Michael Wallis, Jenifer Lewis, Cheech Marin, Paul Dooley and Lloyd Sherr.

Do little kids really care about getting older and losing your relevancy in a big animated feature like this? Not much but the "Toy Story" sequels explored those aspects well and they became great movies, Pixar is trying to reignite the same magic again with their latest animated sequel "Cars 3" but I'm afraid it has a busted engine. I know little boys love these movies but "Cars 3" is just another cynical marketing ploy for selling more toys, backpacks, bed sheets, kiddie cups and lunch boxes. Remember the backlash against "Cars 2"? You know the one Pixar film where they decided to put Larry the Cable Guy's rusty tow truck character as the main lead and put him in a spy movie charade? The filmmakers finally learned their lesson and decided to drift the focus back to Lightning McQueen. That was a good change on their part but it's simply not enough to excuse this film for having an unoriginal storyline and weak characters.

Just like with Manny, Sid and Diego in the "Ice Age" series, Lightning McQueen (voiced by Owen Wilson) and Mater (voiced by Larry the Cable Guy) were never engaging characters to begin with and there's nothing extraordinary or unique about them. The plot revolves around Lightning McQueen and his racing friends getting outpaced by a new generation of racers led by Jackson Storm (voiced by Armie Hammer). These new racers have the tech and speed to blaze away the old competition. As more and more old-time racers retire due to getting overshadowed by the young racers, Lightning McQueen isn't willing to give up but during the final race of the season, he loses control and gets into a violent rollover crash.

Four months later, McQueen is fully recovered and he hopes to get back on the racing track. McQueen meets with a rich business car named Sterling (voiced by Nathan Fillion), he's the new owner of Lightning's Rust-eze racing team and he assigns him to a racing trainer and technician named Cruz Ramirez (voiced by Cristela Alonzo). Instead of fixing him to become a fast and hot rod racer just like the young racers, Cruz thinks that her exercising methods will help McQueen beat the young competition but he grows impatient. Sterling believes that McQueen's racing days are over but McQueen makes a deal with him. If he wins the first race of the season, McQueen will get to keep his #95 title, if he loses he will retire from racing.

For help improving on his speed, McQueen tracks down an old friend of his former mentor Doc Hudson, his former crew chief and mechanic, Smokey (voiced by Chris Cooper). Lightning also encounters several other racing friends of Doc and Smokey teaches him ways on how to outsmart Jackson Storm instead of trying to speed up to him. We also get a contrived story arc with Cruz hoping to catch her dream of becoming a famous race car herself and what do you know (SPOILER ALERT!) McQueen bestows his racing status to Cruz because it's her time to shine now!

Not only is "Cars 3" by far the worst Pixar film since well... the last "Cars" movie, it also has the distasteful distinction of bringing Paul Newman back from the grave. Even though he has been dead for almost nine years now and Pixar paid a special tribute for Newman in "Cars 2", the filmmakers thought it would be wise to take old recording sessions of Newman and original "Cars" director John Lasseter talking about cars and big car guys and cobbled them together to create the flashback sequences in this movie. Pixar let me ask you this. What would Newman's friends and family say about this? Okay, Paul Newman might've been a big racing guy but would he ever justify this as a posthumous final film role? If he were still alive today, I think he will sue for gross misconduct and negligence.

"Cars 3" does have vibrant colors and lovely images but my big problem with this film is that there is no story. We're supposed to care about Lightning McQueen because he's getting old and slow but the movie fails to give us a reason why we should care. Secondly, why is Mater in these movies? Other than being Lightning's clueless best friend and giving Larry the Cable Guy a job, Mater doesn't add anything to this enterprise. He's the Jar Jar Binks of the Pixar universe. Oh yeah, we also take a trip back to Radiator Springs because you know we like seeing Lightning's unmemorable best friends from the first two "Cars" movies. Sally Carrera (voiced by Bonnie Hunt), Luigi (voiced by Tony Shalhoub), Guido (voiced by Guido Quaroni), Fillmore (voiced by Lloyd Sherr), Sarge (voiced by Paul Dooley), Sheriff (voiced by Michael Wallis), Ramone (voiced by Cheech Marin) and Flo (voiced by Jenifer Lewis) are all back and they're mostly here to support Lightning because the film keeps telling us they're friends.

Just when I thought Pixar was back in their creative form, they fall off the track again with their most safest and mediocre animated film yet. The whole basis of this "Cars" universe is weird and strange because do a male car and female car get horny and have sex?, do they give birth? and do they pay taxes just like everyday Americans? "Cars 3" is neither fast or furious enough to match with Pixar's far better animated efforts like the "Toy Story" films, "Ratatouille", "WALL-E", "Up" and "Inside Out".