Review of Carmilla, the Lesbian Vampire (2004) by Mike T — 20 Feb 2008
If you can come up with something worse than "abysmal," then, by all means, use it to describe this movie. Vampires Vs. Zombies had no plot to speak of, random lesbian sex sequences for no apparent reason, terribly choreographed and poorly acted fight scenes, and thoroughly ridiculous dialogue.
If you can make sense of this movie, you win a prize. It claims to be about "the battle between the living dead and the undead," but this cannot be farther from the truth. Zombies and Vampires never actually fight each other in the movie.
Furthermore, there are perhaps 3 vampires and only a handful of zombies in the entire movie, and the zombies are mostly shown getting hit by cars. It's supposed to take place during a zombie apocalypse, but for some reason everyone in the world is going about their merry business as though walking, flesh-eating monsters meandering the town is commonplace.
It only runs for 85 minutes, but believe me, it feels like much longer. I recommend watching this movie only if you have plans to kill yourself shortly after, but even then, I'd recommend hanging the noose before pressing play, as you might want it handy.
This review of Carmilla, the Lesbian Vampire (2004) was written by Mike T on 20 Feb 2008.
Carmilla, the Lesbian Vampire has generally received negative reviews.
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