Review of Bullet Train (2022) by Jluis_001 — 06 Aug 2022

Bullet Train is an attempt a la Quentin Tarantino and Guy Ritchie on steroids directed by a fairly average director who knows his way around the action terrain but lacks the expertise to construct a compelling story. In Bullet Train nothing matters. There are connections between the characters, some stupid and empty motives, and supposedly professional killers who are basically a joke. Everyone wants to kill each other, but nothing makes any sense. There are characters like the ones performed by Zazie Beetz, Logan Lerman and Karen Fukuhara who don't do **** except show up for a few moments, which completely wastes them and that's not even counting the cameos by Channing Tatum, Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds.

As I said, since nothing really matters, there's no real use in knowing how it's all going to end, and you won't even care who lives and who dies, because yes, although it's not abundant, when the violence does appear, it's more brutal than I expected, but it's still of no use, cause the violence it ain't the climax of the show, but the punchline. This film is a mind-numbing experience. All that matters is that you go on the journey and that it entertains you enough so that you don't feel ripped off once the end comes.

And it's not that I tried to make sense of a movie that warns you from the beginning that that's not its purpose, and I get it, there are movies that are just made to be fun and goofy, it's just that that's not something that satisfies me.

I was going to give it only two stars, but it earns the extra half for what its cast does well, not what the script offered them.