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Last updated: 22 Jun 2026 at 16:04 UTC

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Review of by Kenan I — 30 May 2010

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Why don't we tie the knot, bump uglies, and ride the pork bus to tuna city?

Three rather attractive young ladies are on a mission to uncover a rumored treasure in the desert. The treasure was hid by a local drug lord. They capture and torture the drug lord and find the location of the treasure; however, once they arrive at the location, all hell breaks loose.

"I would have to ask you, very politely of course, to yank on my dong.".

Rick Jacobson, director of Bad Guys, Wildlife Wars, and episodes of Xena, Spartacus: Blood and Sand, Baywatch, La Femme Nikita, and Hercules, delivers Bitch Slap. The storyline for this picture reminded me of Usual Suspects mixed with Reservoir Dog mixed with soft porn. The cast was mediocre and included Julia Voth (Love Hurts), Erin Cummings (Mad Men and Spartacus: Blood and Sand), America Olivo (Friday the 13th), Kevin Sorbo, Lucy Lawless, and Michael Hurst (Hercules).

"You fucking whore. You blew off my teabag.".

Bitch Slap is a Grindhouse picture that does the genre justice in the manner in which it depicts the ladies and the marvelously written script; however, the female fight scenes and water fight/shovel sequence were overdone. I watched the "unrated" version of this picture and was surprised how little nudity or additional content it seemed to display (there was little to no nudity in this picture). Overall, my wife and I enjoyed this picture for what it was but it could have been better.

"Just gather around and slob my nob.".

Grade: C-.

This review of Bitch Slap (2009) was written by on 30 May 2010.

Bitch Slap has generally received negative reviews.

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