Review of Birth (2004) by Marcus T — 09 Aug 2007

BIRTH Wishy-washy mystery featuring annoying boy.

The film gets off to a bad start. Firstly what was the deal with Nicole Kidman's Peter Pan haircut?? It looks ridiculous and does absolutely nothing for her. Hearing her dialogue one really does sense a bit of a deja-vu from Eyes Wide Shut; lots of awkward whispering. In fact it didn't feel all that right that her partner in the film was not Tom Cruise. Anyway, Kidman plays a widow who is about to re-marry but is confronted and harassed by a 10-year old boy who claims to be her late husband's reincarnation. That is actually the entire film in a nutshell.

The plot is really quite lame, and to pull it off as a film worth screening, the script and acting had to be spot on, especially when it comes to the boy who is the central character in the story. Unfortunately he is totally unconvincing.

Firstly, he dives straight in, head first with his claim of being a reincarnation of Kidman's dead husband. I could not imagine any reincarnated person being that naive. Surely her reincarnated husband would start off easy in order to slowly convince Kidman, given that any such revelation would be highly traumatic and unbelievable. But no, he is straight in there with "don't marry your fiance!!", with boringly predictable consequences. On top of that his smart-arse arrogance, gormlessness and deliberate inability to smile added to my growing urge to throw him into the nearest fireplace.

The Rooney factor....

Another thing about this boy which is so cringeworthy is his resemblance to ROONEY. Rooney, for the benefit of Americans, is a footballer (or soccer star as you people might say) who plays for a team called Manchester in the UK and who's face, is splashed over every thrash-filled tabloid in circulation. The unfortunate thing is that his face resembles that of SHREK. He is a grossly deformed being with a face like a "Rottweiler's arse". Anyway sorry for digressing, but the point is, one prefers not to be reminded to such ghastly individuals on the big screen!

The intimate scenes between boy and Kidman are an absolute bore. In these scenes, and indeed any other for that matter, the boy displays not a tiny hint of emotion. He is throughout, completely gormless. How Nicole Kidman could be charmed by this is beyond me. In fact, I think any boy picked randomly from the streets could do a better job than him.

One minor positive is that the soundtrack is quite intriguing, and atmospheric, adding to the film an air of magic and mystery. The moody cinematography is also noteworthy.

But a false sense of mystery is created in the film by not explaining clearly enough the thoughts and intentions of the characters and having long, drawn out scenes which are all a bit wishy-washy. At times it was as though the director was so bored he had fallen asleep and forgot to say cut.

The film is certified 15. But take away the one brief sex scene and 2 mild swear words and we have here a U. Nicole Kidman gives a sturdy performance as usual but that doesn't repair the damage done by the boy and the bad script.