Review of Beauty and the Beast (2017) by Nkond39 — 28 Mar 2017

Ok. Live-action version of "Beauty and the Beast". What works in a cartoon, does NOT work in live-action.

You all know the story, we got this Prince dude. He's like all shallow and superficial and only likes pretty girls. And the supposed message of the movie is that true beauty lies inside. Which is actually crap in and of itself, but let's not delve into that right now. How this movie goes about delivering that message about inner beauty? First, Beautiful Enchantress. Has to be beautiful. Cause if it was ugly enchantress that turned Prince into Beast, that's just cruel. But if she's beautiful then she must be kind and it all must be some kinda lesson. Next. The Beast. Oh come on! You call THAT "The Beast"?! Its a goddamn big fluffy anthropomorphic lion with cute horns. An animated Beast was scarier! There is no real challenge in falling in love with him once he stops being a total dickwad. Enchantress should've turned him into a friggin Alien monster! See if Belle could drop a kiss on that mucus dripping mug! And anyway. Are we teaching Belle about importance of inner beauty? The Belle. Ok. So the main reason for Enchantress to put a spell on The Beast was to teach him a lesson that a pretty face is not all that important and all that "don't judge the book by its cover" crap. Enter Emma Watson. Come on! I would read through any book with that kinda cover! Even if it was full with boring "data reconfiguration and statistical analysis" reports! What kind of a lesson is The Beast learning? That if you are:

1. Big and powerful.

2. Own a castle.

3. Not a total jerk (this is why its a fairy tale, in real life if you got the fist two covered, you can be a jerk).

Then you still get the pretty girl, even if you got a "setback" of looking like a big cute lion with curly horns. Anyway, you still turn into pretty boy after she plops a smoochie on your hairy face.

What is the lesson learned here? Come on, really? To really get the message across, Belle should've been the fugliest girl in the village, and The Beast should've stayed in beastly form, no matter how many kisses.

That stuff should've remained animated! Was way easier to suspend disbelief.