Review of AVP: Alien vs. Predator (2004) by Halfwelshman — 14 Feb 2012

While re-watching AVP, I found myself feeling a profound sense of de-ja vu. Where have I witnessed this exact same plot before? Oh - now I remember - Resident Evil. Writer/Director Paul W S Anderson isn't only plundering two successful sci-fi series with this film, he's ripping off his own films.

In both we have a team of "experts" going underground on a journey of discovery, with a hidden, sinister purpose, and in both, things go sour when something nasty begins to pick off team members one-by-one.

I wasn't expecting originality from a film based on a game that in turn is based on two series of films, but come on, Mr Anderson - change the record! Anyway, the film offers just about what you'd expect from the title Alien vs.

Predator - two icons of science fiction turning each other into goo, with poor old humanity stuck in the middle. The characterisation is lacking even by Anderson's standards - we follow a team of stereotypes, each with a singular emotion, or personality quirk, or debilitating illness that defines them.

Sanaa Lathan is meant to be the film's hero, but simply comes across as a Ripley knock-off crossed with Bear Grylls. Colin Salmon, though effortlessly cool as always, plays EXACTLY the same character he did in Anderson's Resident Evil.

You've also got such interesting characters as archaeologist Sebastian (Raoul Bova), who's Italian, Graeme (Ewan Bremner), who's Scottish, Mark the mercenary (Tommy Flanagan) who's got a scar, and Adele (Agathe de La Boulaye) who's French AND a woman.

Wow, these are really the kinds of characters you can get emotionally invested in. At least you've got Lance Henriksen at least attempting to give a performance as Mr Weyland (and giving the film some semblance of continuity with the Alien series), though he generally manages to get by simply by having an awesome voice.

Despite the lazy characters and pretty dreadful script, to Paul W S Anderson's credit, the film does get a whole lot better once the titular extra-terrestrial brawl begins in earnest. Anderson has undeniable skill in directing action sequences, and the acid-blood-spraying fights are extremely entertaining.

As fun as they are, they begin far too late in the film, and you are forced to sit through a good half-hour of clunky exposition before anything really kicks off. AVP is an emotionless, inhuman affair, but the action is well-handled, and both the xenomorphs and predators look better than they ever have.

If we were subjected to a less drawn-out build to the first set-piece, and if the filmmakers hadn't been so greedy and pandered to a pre-teen audience, we might have had a pretty good time watching two races of gruesome monsters pounding each other to fluorescent pulp.

As it is, the film is passably entertaining, but nothing else. It's too empty, too long, and nowhere-near scary or violent enough.