Review of Anonymous (2011) by Cinemaphile — 28 Jul 2016

Anonymous is an Elizabethan whodunnit with slick production values brought to you by he who cannot be named. No, not Voldemort, but the creative mind behind Independence Day and Godzilla. Anyone with a little knowledge of the era and the sense of a billy goat will recognize the implausibility of the plot based on a discredited academic theory that Earl of Oxford was the genius behind William Shakespeare. To boot, scribe John Orloff of Band of Brothers fame, throws in a second academic theory, that of Prince Tudor, bastard son of Elizabeth I and same said Earl. Orloff then doubles down on the implausible by having the Earl of Oxford himself be Elizabeth's first bastard son, giving this conspiracy-fest an oh so needed Oedipal quality it was heretofore lacking.

Anonymous, like Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter, is a dangerously indulgent jaunt down the lane of fictional history. Films such as this one make the jobs of real educators much harder, couching sensational, salacious and entertaining fiction as within the realm of probability.

It's not possible to libel the dead, but this craptacular vehicle does it's damn level best.

Avoid this film like the plague, you'll glean nothing from it other than a vague sense that you have some secret, knowledge akin to that bestowed by The DaVinci Code.