Review of Annie (2014) by Archangelaries — 17 Jul 2020

This film, like so many others nowadays, fell victim to a woke political ideology. The character design, plot, and writing took a back seat to service a political message replacing an iconic story and character with a ethnic spin that just doesn't work here. Good on the cast for doing their best with what they're given; Jamie Fox, Cameron Diaz, Quvenzhane Wallis all do decent jobs portraying the characters they were given... But overall, the film falls flat because of the improper translation from a film originally set in the great depression, featuring an outspoken spunky little girl orphan who can charm the ice off of a billionaire's heart and beat up any boy bully who crosses her path, into a bland urban interpretation that neither represents the original or executes well on its own.

Furthermore, the very beginning of the film teases to the uneducated (or naïve) a sense of nostalgia by opening with the original "Annie" looking character, only to spit in the nostalgic person's eye as if to say "Ha! You thought it was gonna be about a white girl? Nope this is a black girl's story now!" Which in all honesty that particular aspect of this film does the original a major disservice. This foul might've been able to be overcome, if some of the most important aspects of the original were truly honored, and if the writing at least aspired to be on par with its predecessor, but once again, the writing and execution fall second fiddle to the agenda that Hollywood decides that viewers need crammed down their throats.

By no means am I against swapping a character's race to a Black, or Hispanic, or Asian, or whatever... But, when it's obvious that your main focus is identity politics, race baiting, and ant-male feminist rhetoric, instead of remaking a storytelling musical masterpiece with proper flow, and emotion, and impact, and pizazz... Then you spend all your Hollywood film budget catering to a minor part of the population who statistics say are more than likely to torrent your films than buy them or financially support them in anyway, and boycott them if you rub their woke sensibilities one nanometer in the wrong direction. And by doing so alienate any core fanbase that could've possibly been entertained by your remake, if you had done it right. In short, the film is a flop. It couldn't decide if it wanted to be a fresh new story from the modern black orphan perspective, or an entertaining nostalgic cash grab. So instead, it failed at both. If you are a fan of the original, I would surmise that you would be nonstop cringing through this botched abortion of a film. It would've been much better off trying to be a more down to earth Black Orphan Musical story or a strict "parallel" remake, than what drivel this dumpster fire masquerading as a film spews out of its proverbial cake-hole. Avoid this film at all costs if you have any love for the original, or even if you are seeking to be entertained by a quality picture, because this one? This one is not it.