Review of Along Came a Spider (2001) by Ryan C — 27 Aug 2014

I'm sure there are a wealth of worthy thrillers to be made from the James Patterson "Alex Cross" novels, and maybe "Along Came a Spider" might have even been one during another day and age. As it stands, this is a forgettable film hampered every step of the way by a bland cast and weak script riddled with red herrings and ridiculous cliches.

The story as it is set up is an intriguing one, but it gets so polluted along the way with preposterous plot twists and silly story lines that are never fully resolved. Morgan Freeman cannot be faulted as Cross, despite the fact that he is saddled with some pretty lame dialogue meant to make him sound wise and mysterious. It does little to convey the character as the master sleuth he's meant to be.

The rest of the cast is disappointing, with Monica Potter little more than just another pretty face playing a Secret Service agent and Michael Wincott as the not-very-menacing villain. The real bad guy here is screenwriter Marc Moss, who litters his script with meaningless complications and shocks that only work because they're so outlandish that there's no plausible way they make sense. It's bad enough he throws one Secret Service agent in on the kidnapping plot, but when the final twist is revealed, you'll want to head for the exits. Yeah, you won't see it coming but that's not a compliment because the whole thing defies logic.

The pieces for a good puzzle are all present in "Along Came a Spider". The problem is that when you put them together, you discover you have a lot more pieces than you need.