Review of Alone in the Dark (2005) by Zombiehampster — 28 Oct 2010
I don't know what would be better; a world without Uwe Boll or a world with him. The movies he makes are nothing but fodder for professional critics to stretch their comedy writing chops, and I love to read articles on how much they hate his movies and make fun of them.
When I first saw Alone in the Dark, I almost couldn't believe what I was watching. It was like my 8 year old nephew was handed a decent sum of money to make the most "super cool action alien movie of the year!" The whole thing is an object lesson on what not to do in a movie, from the directing, special effects, casting, and sound.
It does it all, and it does it all badly to the point of wondering if you're being punk'd by Ashton Kutcher. I can safely say that I found nothing to be redeeming in this movie: from Christian Slater's outfit and dialogue, to the fact that Tara Reid is supposed to be a scientist because she puts on glasses to make her "look smart".
They might as well have had her attempt an English accent, but then I'm sure the United States would be forced to apologize profusely for that insult to their country and accent. That being said, I actually love to watch this movie, if only for the chance to laugh.
Maybe I'm sick, but movies like these make me appreciate the real gems even more so. Much like Pink Flamingos, I'd say to at least see it once...but bring the brain bleach (or the brain and eye bleach if you watch Pink Flamingos).
This review of Alone in the Dark (2005) was written by Zombiehampster on 28 Oct 2010.
Alone in the Dark has generally received very negative reviews.
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