Review of A Good Day to Die Hard (2013) by Adam F — 16 Apr 2014

While the original "Die Hard" was a smart action movie with a realistic, everyday hero; "A Good Day To Die Hard" is a ridiculous tale where explosions, car crashes and broken windows have replaced such trivial things as intelligence and plausibility. Most action films take their leads and throw them around pretty roughly and it's true that most characters would have quit or died halfway through their stories if the movies they starred in were truly realistic but "A Good Day To Die Hard" takes this idea to a whole new level. John McClane (Bruce Willis) is travelling to Russia to bail out his estranged son from the latest jam he's found himself in. Little does he know that Jack (Jai Courtney) is actually a CIA officer that is trying to protect political prisoner, former billionaire and government whisteblower Yurik Komarov (Sebastian Koch) from being killed by a corrupt Russian official. John is accustomed to getting into all sorts of hairy situations, but this time, he's in a strange land and has to team up with his son!

This is the definition of a dumb action movie. Characters get into car crashes where vehicles smash through concrete walls, flip over numerous times, go flying through the air or collide with who knows how many vehicles and never get even a single scratch on them. It's not like we're given any explanations for this either, not even a half-assed one. John McClane never pushes down an airbag after surviving the crash that demolished his truck; he just dusts himself off and runs to the next vehicle to continue the car chase. People jump through glass windows and fall several stories onto hard surfaces like it's nothing and as the indestructible characters manage to evade one certain death after another, you start being entertained not because you're tense about who is going to make it and how, but by the sheer stupidity of it all.

The movie is also filled with plot holes and there are multiple sequences that start falling apart once you start applying simple logic to them. There's a scene for instance, where Jack is trying to pick a break into a car by picking the door lock. Suddenly, his father (who was off-screen a moment ago) arrives with the keys to the door. We don't get an explanation for how John got those specific keys to this specific vehicle; we're just expected to go with it. We're also expected to believe that Russian scientists have somehow developed this magic wand that eliminates radiation just by waving it around and that Moscow is completely devoid of police forces. I guess completely devoid isn't quite the right word, because we do hear sirens in the distance, but when the villains are able to blow up buildings, fly military helicopters freely around the city and lead our heroes into high-speed chases without seeing any repercussions you really wonder what is keeping the boys in blue (red?) so busy.

Logic is only one of the problems in the film. The villains are very bland and because the director knows this, he gives them distinct quirks instead of personalities. We can recognize who they were once they are gunned down because a moment ago they were spouting off catch phrases or doing their trademark actions: we get the dancing guy, the strong one with the tattoos, the evil lady, the evil politician guy and more. Sure they've all got names but you won't be able to remember them because they are not interesting characters. There are a couple of unexpected twists here and there but those raise a lot of questions when they are brought up. I will give credit to the action sequences, which are impressive, but some are shot and edited very poorly (a scene where John and Jack manage to escape from "the dancing guy" for example, still makes me wonder what exactly happened).

The movie keeps moving quickly throughout and many of the problems only come apparent once the movie has stopped and your brain can start processing what just happened but there are so many logical errors that they're impossible to ignore. The special effects and stunts are well done, but what do they mean in a film that doesn't hold up in the end? You certainly won't be bored in "A Good Day to Die Hard" and there are a lot of sequences that are fun but not only is it easily the worst chapter in the series, it's not a very good action film on its own merit. (Theatrical version on the big screen, March 19, 2013).