Review of 6 Underground (2019) by Pop_Rivett — 14 Dec 2019

The best way to describe this film is "aggressively idiotic." Take everything you know about Michael Bay films - frenetic action, unnecessary explosions, inexplicably-placed shots of beautiful women, racial stereotypes, and an epilepsy-inducing number of cuts per second, and then remove anything that made his other films even remotely bearable, then stretch a plot so thin and utterly beyond credibility over two hours, complete with unlabeled flashbacks, random and disconnected moments of character motivation, and dialogue that flits so rapidly between unfunnily glib to unbearably macho-melodramatic that it might give you mental whiplash. Not even Ryan Reynolds can improve the limpid dialogue and allegedly "comic" scenes.

Imagine the frenetic catastrophe that was the latest Transformers movie, then remove the charm of the Transformers themselves, and you'll be getting close.

It is a masterclass in awfulness. I feel like it should be in future cinema studies subjects with titles like "How to make a truly terrible film on a gigantic budget.