Review of 13 Assassins (2010) by Michael G — 28 Sep 2012

This is the seventh samurai era film I've ever seen and it is the third best. The first two are Seven Samurai and Yojimbo so coming in third is not so bad. This movie sets the tone right from the get go as you watch a man commit harakiri. You don't see the blade enter, but you see the pain on his face and can here as he tears out his inside. The message is clear :this is not going to be pleasant viewing.

If anything, the film is intense and brutal. The plot is that twelve samurai are charged with assassinating the Shogun's half brother. The man is a first rate bastard both literally and figuratively, and is next in line to rule Japan. The films shows that he is rapist and murdering sociopath with very little left to the imagination. It's quite obvious to why he has to die.

With that established, the film goes through its recruiting phase, which does an barely adequate job of introducing the entire cast. With thirteen protagonist, too little time is spent getting to know these men. I will grant though, most of them are pretty interesting from the little bits I did get to see.

The core of the movie, and what really made it work, is the action. Holy crap: thirteen men vs two hundred! The action sequence is ludicrous, but also brilliant. In fact, the third act of the film is one huge kinetic megabrawl. Though it is impossible for a film to show two hundred men die in any realistic fashion the film aims for this goal admirably. The heroes are a fury of agile vengeance as they attempt to murder every single samurai that stands in their way.

It was certainly exciting to watch.

In the end the 13 Samurai succeeds. I was entertained despite some of the melodrama (the bastard cuts the limbs off, rapes, AAAND cuts the tongue out of a peasant girl, come the fuck on). However, I wish that more time was spent in getting to know each of the assassins better. This is where Seven Samurai succeeds and this film fails. Akira Kurosawa's masterpiece makes you enamored with his seven before each one falls, while 13 makes you just notice, "Hey that was number eleven. I guess that means there are ten more to go.".